the things which makes you think you've matured.. a bit.

i just wasted spent about 2 and a half hours bowsing through my old blog. yes, the one that suddenly refused to work properly after all those years of attention and love i had poured into. but thankfully i'm still able to access the archives of those long forgotten post from donkey years ago through my account.

apparently, reading only about a selective quarter of a total of 342 posts somehow put a smile on my face and gave me hope. i managed to pull through those dreadful days months back then. what is it that's stopping me now? those days were erratic and just plain awful. but i found a few particular posts very encouraging for myself. one of them being:

"it's hard to learn to take the first step yourself
babies struggle hard to balance and take their first steps
the first few steps always end in falls
but they have support, their parents are there to guide and to help them
slowly step by step, the baby soon learn to walk
once they start to walk, they will not crawl anymore.

if i hadn't learn to love and find happiness, it wouldnt be so hard now
i won't have to fall back in fear, i would have continued walking on just as i was

but life isn't about 'what if's and 'maybe's.. what's done has been done.
it's just a long road to walk on whether you like it or not.

keep walking."

i used to write very much better back then. my stories were nonsensically hillarious, even those that were meant to be written when i'm pissed and unsatisfied with something.

though it may be somewhat a little different this time, but i'll still keep Johnnie Walker in mind.. lols =)