poop

Eat shit! Makan tahi! Yak si arr!

why am I so prone to harrasments these days?!!

it's haunting me!

trauma trauma trauma!!!!!!!!!!!

chee byee.

[Posted with iBlogger from my iPod touch]

a sudden halt

I need to drop everything for the moment and try to handle this shit.

I'm being stalked, harrased and may potentially be threatened. (you may think it's a lil too dramatic an exaggerated but I'm preparing myself for the worst! something tells me that something is not right and might just turn out bad, you'll understand when I tell you the situation) I don't want to end up hitting the headlines on issues and cases which are currently seen in the newspapers on a daily basis.

I'm worried and scared shit.

but by hook or by crook, I need to solve this problem!

[Posted with iBlogger from my iPod touch]

i'm writing you a note.

it's nice receiving news about someones marriage, how sweet your friend's boyfriend are treating them or how loving seeing an old couple strolling down the park hand in hand. but at the same time it's heartbreaking knowing that i'm not that fortunate enough, just yet.

whereas it feels so scary hearing news about how all kinds of problems start to arise when they just started to continue on with their chapters as husband and wife.

it makes my heart beat in confusion and fear.

but i guess sometimes it's just that leap of faith you'll have to take.


Love the Way You Lie - Eminem ft. Rihanna

Just gonna stand there
And watch me burn
But that's alright
Because I like
The way it hurts
Just gonna stand there
And hear me cry
But that's alright
Because I love
The way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie

I can't tell you what it really is
I can only tell you what it feels like
And right now there's a steel knife
In my windpipe
I can't breathe
But I still fight
While I can fight
As long as the wrong feels right
It's like I'm in flight
High of a love
Drunk from the hate
It's like I'm huffing paint
And I love it the more that I suffer
I suffocate
And right before I'm about to drown
She resuscitates me
She fucking hates me
And I love it
Wait
Where you going
I'm leaving you
No you ain't
Come back
We're running right back
Here we go again
It's so insane
Cause when it's going good
It's going great
I'm Superman
With the wind at his back
She's Lois Lane
But when it's bad
It's awful
I feel so ashamed
I snap
Who's that dude
I don't even know his name
I laid hands on her
I'll never stoop so low again
I guess I don't know my own strength

Just gonna stand there
And watch me burn
But that's alright
Because I like
The way it hurts
Just gonna stand there
And hear me cry
But that's alright
Because I love
The way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie

You ever love somebody so much
You can barely breathe
When you're with them
You meet
And neither one of you
Even know what hit 'em
Got that warm fuzzy feeling
Yeah them chills
Used to get 'em
Now you're getting fucking sick
Of looking at 'em
You swore you've never hit 'em
Never do nothing to hurt 'em
Now you're in each other's face
Spewing venom
And these words
When you spit 'em
You push
Pull each other's hair
Scratch, claw, bit 'em
Throw 'em down
Pin 'em
So lost in the moments
When you're in 'em
It's the rage that took over
It controls you both
So they say it's best
To go your separate ways
Guess that they don't know ya
Cause today
That was yesterday
Yesterday is over
It's a different day
Sound like broken records
Playin' over
But you promised her
Next time you'll show restraint
You don't get another chance
Life is no Nintendo game
But you lied again
Now you get to watch her leave
Out the window
Guess that's why they call it window pane

Just gonna stand there
And watch me burn
But that's alright
Because I like
The way it hurts
Just gonna stand there
And hear me cry
But that's alright
Because I love
The way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie

Now I know we said things
Did things
That we didn't mean
And we fall back
Into the same patterns
Same routine
But your temper's just as bad
As mine is
You're the same as me
But when it comes to love
You're just as blinded
Baby please come back
It wasn't you
Baby it was me
Maybe our relationship
Isn't as crazy as it seems
Maybe that's what happens
When a tornado meets a volcano
All I know is
I love you too much
To walk away though
Come inside
Pick up your bags off the sidewalk
Don't you hear sincerity
In my voice when I talk
Told you this is my fault
Look me in the eyeball
Next time I'm pissed
I'll aim my fist
At the dry wall
Next time
There will be no next time
I apologize
Even though I know it's lies
I'm tired of the games
I just want her back
I know I'm a liar
If she ever tries to fucking leave again
I'mma tie her to the bed
And set this house on fire

Just gonna stand there
And watch me burn
But that's alright
Because I like
The way it hurts
Just gonna stand there
And hear me cry
But that's alright
Because I love
The way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie

he still remembered how it was that night.
i still didn't move,
i still hadn't change,
i still stayed the same =(

as when i was, 4 years ago.

she's feeling the pinch

and the pressure is on!

it's high time to grow up and think beyond her years for a while.

what if plan A fails? what's plan B or C or D?

*gasp*

sigh.

[Posted with iBlogger from my iPod touch]

Shontelle - Impossible

I remember years ago
Someone told me I should take
Caution when it comes to love
I did, I did

And you were strong and I was not
My illusion, my mistake
I was careless, I forgot
I did

And now when all is done
There is nothing to say
You have gone and so effortlessly
You have won
You can go ahead tell them

Tell them all I know now
Shout it from the roof tops
Write it on the sky line
All we had is gone now

Tell them I was happy
And my heart is broken
All my scars are open
Tell them what I hoped would be
Impossible, impossible
Impossible, impossible

Falling out of love is hard
Falling for betrayal is worst
Broken trust and broken hearts
I know, I know

Thinking all you need is there
Building faith on love is worst
Empty promises will wear
I know, I know

And know when all is gone
There is nothing to say
And if you're done with embarrassing me
On your own you can go ahead tell them

Tell them all I know now
Shout it from the roof tops
Write it on the sky line
All we had is gone now

Tell them I was happy
And my heart is broken
All my scars are open
Tell them what I hoped would be
Impossible, impossible
Impossible, impossible
Impossible, impossible
Impossible, impossible!
Ooh impossible (yeah yeah)

I remember years ago
Someone told me I should take
Caution when it comes to love
I did...

aint they pweety? i remembered your words. ♥

so much to update on!

but now since everyone's all footie crazy, i'll have my pick on GERMANY! the reason being? cos got a lot of 'entau bahS'! *grin*

till then,

she needs to do what she thinks is impossible and accepts that some things are just impossible.

The big baby still cries.

But you have no idea how relieving it is.

i'm drained. so so drained, both physically and mentally.

i've so much to tell but the long term exposure to changing numbers in traffic light-like colours and cold air somewhat dried my brains.

while some things cant possibly be put into words.

another weekend's here. a busy one this time.

like and dont like it.

keep going

like running the 1500m event. you start off at a steady fast pace, making sure you get a good start cos it's going to be a long run. it's crucial to keep going and maintaining the pace but after a few rounds, your legs start to feel wobbly and tired. you feel drained as you look ahead, pushing yourself very hard to lift your legs one after another, making each step nearer to the finishing line which still isn't in sight. as much as you feel like stopping and giving up, you know you cant. everyone has their hopes up high for you; your trainer, your parents, your friends and most importantly, yourself.

it takes time and work to create success. even the seven wonders of the world weren't built in a day, a month or a year.



now i know how she felt.

Sometimes you just want to go back to crying all day long but u know you can't, cos you're stronger than that.

It's a Sunday morning. Let's make it a meaningful one alright?

=)

maybe just these days.

it'll be better =)

give time, time.

the most disconnected ramblings, ever.

i am too easily affected by other people's emotions.

but at least i know, i aint the only one.

he goes through it, i go through it, everyone goes through it.

it seems so much easier to just get on with the next best thing which you think is right.

but it doesnt change the fact, just merely hiding it from sight.

out of sight, out of mind.

someone once told me, sometimes you just have to create a lie to make yourself feel better.

i take mine to the extreme.

i rather deal with death.

i've successfully fabricated the lie into my reality.

i want to hop on the next flight to Melbourne.

would you join me?

so you wont be miles away from her while i wont be from him.

this is ridiculous!

what is happening la wei. okay, so it's the study week and i'm cutting myself some slack, allowing myself to fall asleep like, 3-4 times throughout the day while studying. but waking up from every nap with dreams that revolve only around one particular subject is, stewpit. i rather dream about anything regarding my finals but noOOo. meh. talk about taking naps for a fresher mind. pfftt.

i dont know how to judge, i dont understand why. anyone with rational explanations to all this? bah.

i'm changing and it's scaring me. and because of that, i'm stressed and depressed. shoot.

update soon.

updated:

is it me or i'm really becoming more patient? i must agree that humans are easily influenced. somehow or rather, some people are able to bring out the best or worse in you. it just happens. i'm being pretty nice recently, back to the amy that lets people push her around and sometimes lets them perform their little rain dance on her head as well. but this time around, it doesnt frustrates me at all. which in turn, scares me. there were a number of incidents which occurred throughout the past weeks of which i'm very sure that would have pissed me off but it didnt. instead, it didnt bother me the slightest bit or even at most, 3 minutes of frustration and that's it. very weird. but at times, i think the stress builds up unconsciously till the point that tears just starts to form in my eyes for no apparent reason!

what is wrong with me? =/

i want to go home. i want to just hug my dear garfield and have a good cry.

fresh apple juice with sour plums ('sem bui'). cant beat the one at rangoon road though. =)

the battle

the rational

the masochist

the small fragile one

it's a matter of which one overpowers the others.

According To You

according to you,
i'm moody, i'm demanding, i'm not worth fighting for at all,
according to you,
i'm difficult, hard to please, and i want everything to be right,
i'm a pain in the ass,
and you're the boy who puts up with that,
according to you, according to you.

according to you,
i'm moody, i'm demanding, i'm not worth fighting for at all.

holey, moley, schmoly...

S.T.R.E.S.S.E.D